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Growing Up Weird: how eccentricity can enrich your life!


I was a weird kid. Heck, I'm a weird adult! And if you're reading this and thinking the same (but with you, not me, haha), I'll be explaining a bit about why simply embracing the weird within you is truly the best option. 

I won't lie to you, being odd, which is sometimes (but not always) synonymous with not fitting in, can be rather difficult at times: the constant search for 'your people,' the burning desire to be understood and accepted by others, and the fervent need to express yourself while also attempting to maintain some degree of normalcy. It's far from easy, but it is and will always be worth it. 


Forging an identity

When I was a kid, it soon became apparent that I wasn't really like the other kids. Obviously, everyone is different and individual, but I struggled to see myself in anyone else. Maybe you felt the same? The games others played didn't interest me and my personal style, even at the age of eight or nine, wasn't in line with what was popular. I was a multi-coloured-hat-wearing, aspirational botanist with a ponytail fringe (yes, you read that right, I wore my lengthly fringe as a ponytail: it was somewhat unicorn-esque.). I was never going to be miss/master popular. I was just going to be me. 

I made a big decision when I was younger, quite likely the most important one of my life: I wasn't going to try to fit in. Fitting in, conforming, doing as is expected of you - it's a way of life for most people. But it never hindered me one bit. It can be a protective measure. Bullies shy away from those who are self-assured. Mean remarks are water-off-a-duck's-back when others' opinions aren't valued in the same way as one's own. An identity independent of surroundings (to an extent, obviously) is forged. 

We become our authentic selves when we just start doing exactly what we feel like doing. We do not seek approval, instead we please ourselves and whatever criticism is given, we can choose either ignore or take into consideration. 

It's a choice to embrace our eccentricity and be entirely who we are. And it's a choice we make actively every single day. The whole 'just be yourself' cliché is the best one going! 



Special Interests 

When you're committed to pleasing yourself and expressing yourself authentically to the best of your ability, it is almost inevitable that passions begin to form. These I refer to as special interests (I know it's a term used within autism, but let's bypass the autistic aspect for now, maybe it'll be a topic for another post!) because they are entirely unique to us. 

My special interests have included: Japan and everything related to it, Japanese Lolita fashion (2010-2015), Nietzsche and his philosophy, and clothes in general (present). When the dam breaks and we decide to be fully weird and out there, a bravery develops and we can explore these passions freely. I wore crazy, fun and wonderfully out-there lolita outfits for nearly four years and I never once worried about my peers' reactions. I was just being me. 

These interests can also be highly useful when it comes to study and career. When the subject studied involves a special interest, it creates a love for learning and desire to achieve to honour the interest. I studied Theology and Religious Studies with English at university and I weedled Nietzsche into every essay I could, culminating in my dissertation which was, of course, also about Nietzsche. I'm also hoping to go on to do a Masters, where I will also, of course, write about Nietzsche. 

It's an honour in itself, as well as an advantage, to have the freedom to explore what we love. But it can (often) only come from submitting to the person you are and will become, rather than attempting to fight it all the time. Authenticity brings rewards. 



Self-Acceptance and Self-Love

A surrender to weirdness, to oddity and to eccentricity generates a sense of self-acceptance that few find in a lifetime. I am in the process of finding it myself. Hindsight (and a smidge of wisdom) means that I know now how to treat myself kindly. I know what makes me feel good and what suppresses my creativity. I hope that you too can use what you've learnt to better understand how your brain works and what makes you happy. But it is certain that being someone that you're not, performing for the world when it doesn't have to be a stage, is not how to get there. 

Happiness is not the destination at the end of a long road, it is a love for the journey, the nature of the end of which is entirely unknown. But you do know something: who you are and who you want to be and that 'normal' is overrated. 

The decision to stop denying yourself the pleasure being yourself, being odd, is the first step on the long road to self-love and self-acceptance. It's a leap of faith, and quite possibly the most important jump you will ever need to take. 

I implore you, just flipping jump! I'll meet you at the bottom of wherever we end up, weird and happy and satisfied with who we are. Enjoy being you, it's the simplest pleasure, and the only one we ever truly have control over. 

Right, thank you so much for reading my long and rambly essay about eccentricity, I truly appreciate it! 

If you want more weirdness, please feel free to follow me on instagram @jumper.dweller 

You're all fab, over and out! 

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