Skip to main content

Style Paralysis: How to Get Out of a Style Rut


An attempt at a capsule wardrobe... 

Currently, I'm in a serious style rut. Paradoxically I want to wear everything and nothing in my wardrobe. I love all my clothes but there is some sense that they're just. not. me. 

I feel like everyone can understand this debilitating (style-wise) feeling: the stuff you've accumulated somehow doesn't reflect the person you're on your way to becoming. It's a style-paralysis. And I have some wisdom (sort of) to share on how best to reawaken your style-body and end this paralysis. Let's go! 



Self-love and Positive Body Image: Being Comfortable

A basic sense of self-love and a respect for our bodies is crucial to moving out of a style rut. The way clothes fit and the proportions and materials worn are all so interdependent on how we feel about our bodies. Our assets (legs? boobs? bum?) are to be accentuated often and tight/clingy fabric can make us feel either sexy or mortified, depending on our mood. And moods are so much like the weather: totally unpredictable. 

Clothes can also be used to hide, or as some kind of elaborate disguise, or a masquerade of sorts - a way of presenting a self which is either exaggerated, inauthentic or wishfully thought out. This is where my experience comes in - my clothes are basically an armour for entering the public sphere. I want to be seen a certain way by others and so I dress accordingly. This is partially because I do not quite have the sense of self-love that I deserve.

 A bit crappy quality-wise, but I'm working on wearing tighter tops - here's some evidence!

Self-love is a difficult thing to develop, it's a very long and winding path to travel. There will always be days where you feel down and maybe even ugly, but I assure you: you are beautiful because you are human and you are worthy of love from all because you are a life-force and therefore are intrinsically valuable. 

Developing a sense of love for yourself is a step towards feeling not just comfortable in your clothes, but comfortable in your body. That is the key to the effective expression of style. It's not what you wear, it's how you wear it. Love radiates confidence and confidence brings about enthusiasm, even for those clothes you spend every morning staring at.


A Clear Sense of Self: Chameleon vs. Steadfast

Who is Louise? I ask myself this daily. For a long time, I had no idea, because I'm such a chameleon. Then I came to the conclusion that it is totally A-OK to be a chameleon. It's a valid identity to be changeable. So please don't fret if you can't decide on a personal uniform or if the concept of a capsule wardrobe makes you shake with fear. It's a wonderful thing to be chopping and changing, it's exciting, it's original. 

But if you do have a clear sense of self, firstly I applaud you and secondly, do not be afraid of evolution. There is no end-goal of style, there is no destination or fully-formed uniform for life. Evolution is constant and if you're wanting to make some changes to your style, don't worry that it 'won't suit' you or that it's 'not you'. A sense of paralysis sets in when change is coming about, but I say Run With It! If you want to buy blue jeans instead of black, do it! A skirt instead of shorts? Heck yes. 

Anyway, my point was: follow your instincts. If change is happening, embrace it. Chameleon or steadfast as a rock, or even somewhere inbetween, do not refrain from trying new things. 


Reorganisation Mission

If you can't see the wood (wardrobe) for the trees (clothes), why not try reorganising the placement of the trees? (did that metaphor work?!). 

I mean: take everything out of your wardrobe and reorganise it. Colour coordinate it, put shirts in order of pattern, hang up trousers and jeans rather than putting them in drawers, hang jumpers (sensibly) so you can see them better. Shake it up! It might give you some inspiration, and you have a chance to rumple through and rediscover things you might have forgotten about. 

A quick little tip on the side: if you select some clothes you might be wanting to give away, put them in storage for 2-3 weeks and take them out again. If you're excited to see some of the pieces after their holiday, keep them, if not, send them on their way. 

 
I call this dressing-up session result '80s Prom Witch,' pretty fun, right? (And entirely ridiculous!)

Dressing Up Session

Play dress up! See what works and take lots and lots of pictures. Just experiment and see what makes you feel good. I love dressing up in the evening, and 80s Prom Witch (above) is one of the outfits I came up with. It's flipping fun, seriously, try it. 

Another experiment, this time with a mori girl vibe. 

Right, guys, it's been a long post I must say, but gold star if you read til the end. I hope this post has offered some half-decent tips for recovering from a style paralysis. 

You're all fab, let me know what you thought of this post in the comments, and I'll be posting again soon! 

@jumper.dweller

Over and out <3 


Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Not-Dinner-Party-Appropriate: anecdotes from the mental hospital

 I feel like a time traveller. I've awoken in 2021, sleeping through a pandemic and my teenage years, now in my mid-twenties. I have no dinner-party-appropriate anecdotes. Only mental ill-health with bouts of questionable wellness. I have been in four different mental hospitals, which I predict could be four more than most people. No one talks about it, including me. Like, at all.  Whenever someone talks about mental illness, there is this most impenetrable silence, followed by: 'I knew someone who was depressed once.' Or a casual, almost nonchalant change of subject. I mean, we talk about mental health a lot - how to keep it afloat, how to do 'self-care' in a commercially-assisted sense. It's all body butters and face masks.  I don't like it when people reduce preventing mental illness down to looking after yourself or not. That is a large part of it, a whole team of people looked after me at my worst. Most things cannot be made better with a face mask.  It
3 comments
Read more

Imposters: a story about a Capgras delusion

  It's cold. I'm always so cold. My hands quiver blue and wrists bloom purple, after days of bang, bang, banging my wrist on the arm of my chair. I don't think I'm okay, but I don't think I'm not okay either. I think, I think, I think I'm breaking. I am on the children's ward. I have not seen my real parents for months. Some strange people visit sometimes. I hide from them. They are not my parents. They are often nice and I begin to trust them, then they'll do something off-kilter and I shy away again, like a beaten dog.  I had climbed out of a window, bawled through the lane outside the house and taken solace at a friend's home up the road. Gently I was led back to my childhood home and bundled into the car, driven to the hospital and admitted in hopes of finding a way to avoid another inpatient admission. We couldn't find one.  I arrive at the unit, brittle. Last time I was in this position, I had a home, but now I'm adrift. My parents
2 comments
Read more

Section three - a mental hospital anecdote

  There is so much that I can't tell you about my third admission, so much I can't remember. Illness blurs the details and the privacy I owe to my friends erases the daily minutiae of the unit. In short, I had been sectioned - section three, six months. A treatment order, that in retrospect, could probably have been avoided. Or maybe that is just what I like to tell myself when I think about it late at night.  I had found myself in a field, shivering in the early evening sun. It was July, I was in love, but still very, very ill. I had been taken on four occasions to our local accident and emergency department that week. I was, as I read later in my unit-admission report, 'no longer manageable in the community'. I was sad, but determined. I was determined to make an exit any way I could. Instead I was flown to Woking, heavily sedated - so much so that I have no memory of the journey there and was deemed 'unresponsive' in my admission interview.  I digress. So man
Post a Comment
Read more